Autumn Inspirations

Fall is my favourite time of year. I adore the crisp cool weather, the changing colours on the trees and the smells of burning leaves, freshly baked pumpkin pie and roasted turkey dinners; all things that autumn brings. This time of year always inspires me, and when I feel inspired I love to cook and bake. This past Saturday I woke up with a plan, and that plan involved making magic happen in the kitchen so I set off to the market to collect my ingredients. 

The Covent Garden Market has not received enough attention on City Mom. We are  really lucky to have such an eclectic, quaint and convenient market so close to home. There are so many fabulous things to see and do at the market and some amazing food vendors. I started out by purchasing a Halloween costume for little S at a 100% Canadian children’s clothing vendor called Happy Wear. All the clothes are made here in London. It feels so great to buy and support locally.  

Next I explored the food vendors. I scoured store after store and became inspired to make my two menu choices completely organic. This is not something I normally do. I buy some organic items here and there at my local grocery store but (due mainly to the cost and availability of organic ingredients) I usually go for the more cost-friendly option of non organic so I was rather surprised when I fell in love with a store called Homeopathy London in the northeast corner of the market. I found everything you could ever need to care for your family in the organic, enviro-friendly format from chlorine-free diapers to complete skin care lines for women. There was an entire section devoted to babies & children with names like Seventh Generation, Erba Organics, Weleda & Green Beaver Company.  It was confirmed for me that cost truly is a big factor when buying organic. For example a 32 pack of Broody Chick 100% natural, fully compostable diapers is $27.95 in comparison to $17.97 for a 140 pack of Pampers Baby Dry at a store like Walmart. Obviously you get what you pay for and the more expensive choice is clearly the better one for your child and for the environment but you need to have the budget available to shop in this manner. I long for the means to shop like this on a regular basis. 

But I digress…back to my dinner. I found all of my dry ingredients in this store, my fresh organic vegetables at Havaris Produce and my meat at Field Gate Organics. After a quick validation of my parking voucher (parking is offered free for two hours on weekends and thirty minutes on weekdays) I was heading back home to create my masterpieces. I’m sharing the recipes because they were both so delicious and perfect on a cool Fall evening.  

Autumn Beef Barely Soup
2 lbs ground beef (I used extra lean)
1 large onion chopped
½ cup chopped celery
3.5 cups water
29 oz beef broth*
1 cup barley
29 oz canned diced tomatoes
2 tsp Worcestershire sauce
1 tsp salt
1 tsp dried basil
1 tsp black pepper
½ tsp garlic powder
*I used 1 tsp of Better Than Bouillon organic beef base to 8 oz of boiling water as an alternative to the beef broth.  

Directions:
1. In a Dutch oven, cook the ground beef, onions and celery over medium heat until the meat is no longer pink; drain. Stir in the water and broth; bring to a boil. Reduce heat. Add barley and simmer for 10-20 minutes.
2. Stir in the remaining ingredients. Reduce heat to low; simmer for 1 to 2 hours.
This recipe yields 3 quarts and is perfect for freezing. Thaw in fridge. Place in a saucepan and heat through. There, two meals already sorted out for your busy week ahead.  

Autumn Beef Barley Soup

Chocolate Pumpkin Bread
2 cups all-purpose flour
1-1/3 cups whole wheat flour
3 cups sugar
4 tsp pumpkin pie spice*
2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
½ tsp baking powder
4 eggs
15 oz canned pumpkin*
2/3 cup water
2/3 cup canola oil
2 cups semisweet chocolate chips
*I used a 15 oz can of Farmer’s Market Organic pumpkin pie mix as an alternative to the pumpkin pie spice and canned pumpkin.  

Directions:
1. In a large bowl, combine the first six ingredients. In another bowl, combine the eggs, pumpkin, water and oil; mix into dry ingredients just until moistened. Stir in chocolate chips.
2. Pour into two greased loaf pans. Bake at 350 for 70 – 75 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean. Cool for 10 – 15 minutes before removing from pans.  

This recipe yields two loaves. Wrap one in foil and freeze for up to 3 months. Thaw at room temperature.  

Chocolate Pumpkin Bread

Note: Soup is best enjoyed with a glass of red wine and pumpkin bread with a hot cup of coffee. Mmmmm! Happy eating and Happy Fall!

My Husband the Superhero

He doesn’t wear a cape, he can’t fly and he doesn’t have superhuman strength, but in the eyes of my little girl, her Daddy is a superhero! The term ‘daddy’s girl’ is an understatement in reference to little S. It all begins and ends with Daddy; and for good reason. My husband is a hero…to us at least.

Their kindred relationship blossomed right from the start. I remember the first day we brought little S home from the hospital. I was having a very difficult time with breastfeeding. S wouldn’t latch and I was taking it personally. You carry a child for 9 months; scrutinize everything that goes into your body; take your prenatal vitamins; deliver your child through a gruelling labour, look your little miracle in the eye, fall in love and then you begin to breastfeed. It’s as easy and natural as that. Or is it? For most of us I don’t believe it is. I was heart-broken that everything I had envisioned was not going as planned. So there I was, devastated and crying while my child was rejecting me (or so it felt) and making it clear by using those tiny, tiny lungs to expel every bit of energy she could to muster up a scream. Naturally I pass my helpless child to my husband and she stops. A coincidence? It appears not because the two and half years that have followed have fallen in line with this same theme.

Recently, while we were at the park, little S witnessed a little girl (who was alone) crying and she asked me if the child was crying because she was missing her Daddy; not her Mommy, but her Daddy. It’s Daddy little S wants to comfort her when she is scared and who she runs to when she gets hurt. It’s Daddy who she desires to read bedtime stories and to brush her teeth. When we walk in the front door and Daddy is not home little S will smother his image in our family photo that sits on our console table with kisses when all I got when I picked her up was hug.

Though some days this hurts my ego, most days I am thankful for their special bond. And while I am not exaggerating this story, I am leaving out the love and affection I also receive from our not so little bundle of joy. Though most days little S does show a favouritism for my husband, I know she loves us both the same in her own way. I believe that the relationship a father and daughter have is a very important one. I feel that a strong, healthy relationship of this sort will help to establish standards for my daughter and create the measuring stick to which she will make her judgements and choices by. We are our children’s first role models after all. There’s no job more difficult or important.

Perhaps my husband hides his mask and cape under our bed and there is a strong  possibility that he knows where the Bat Cave really is because recently I learned something about him;  he really is a superhero…and after all these years I only just figured it out!

A Tale of Two Cities

Recently I was fortunate enough to be able to take a two-week vacation from work with my husband and daughter.  Given our recent move and the cost associated with it, we had to make our holiday a ‘stay-cation’.  We enjoyed some wonderful family time.  We ventured out on a few day treks to the beach, enjoyed the city’s wonderful parks, pools and splash pads and spent a few days in Toronto.  It was my time spent in T.O. that prompted this week’s post and a spotlight on a former City Mom.

As I have mentioned before, my husband and I owned a condo in downtown Toronto.  This was pre parenthood, pre monthly diaper budget, pre supplementary clothing and food budget, pre RESP savings plan contributions and the list goes on.  When we learned of my  pregnancy we put the wheels in motion to move back to London despite loving our Toronto locale.  Our main reason was  to be closer to our families.  After all, it is said that it takes a village to raise a child and the extra support is always a good thing.  Financial reasons were a big factor as well.  We needed an extra bedroom and the price of a large three bedroom house in London was far less than a 2 bedroom condo in Toronto.  I toyed with the idea that this unknown baby, once she arrived,  could sleep in our + 1 (den) but reality set in and we made the move. 

From time to time I envision what it would be like for the three of us living in the big city and as we were driving into Toronto for our second time in two weeks I realized some things.  I could not and would not deal with the traffic in the big city.  Anyone who has been stuck in a car with a screaming child for any amount of time would be able to appreciate what I am talking about.    I don’t imagine that I would enjoy being a city mom in T-dot as much as I do in London.  I wonder why that is.  What are the differences between a city like London and a city like Toronto?  Is London a more family friendly city or does this come down to personal preference and specific location within the respective city?  I wanted to dig a little deeper on this topic so I looked within my social group to find the answer.  I decided to interview one of my nearest and dearest friends to gain an alternate perspective.

 Spotlight on a Former City Mom 

Erika is the mother of an adorable 18 month old girl.  Erika is originally from London but is an experienced urbanite;  living most recently in Toronto and Vancouver before that.

Q:  You were a city mom for almost a year before you moved away from the city for a more suburban location.  What were your reasons for this move?
A:  We lived in the heart of downtown Toronto.  Although it was a great location in terms of amenities, it was loud and I found it to be dangerous.  For example, we had prostitutes working at the corner of our place and a youth centre a block and a half from where we lived. The elementary schools and high schools in the area had a history of violence.  There have been shootings and stabbings in the area and I was not comfortable with little E growing up in a neighbourhood with the type of young people who hung around the area.  I was certainly not comfortable with the idea of little E walking around downtown Toronto by herself when she got older. 

 Q:  Can you highlight the benefits of your new location in comparison to your city location?
A:

• Currently, we live in a beautiful neighbourhood.  It is quiet, there are lots of kids in the area and everyone is very friendly (people actually say hi when they walk by.  Unlike Toronto where everyone is in too much of a rush to notice anything).  There are parks, trails and all the amenities we could ever need all within walking distance.  I am much more comfortable walking around my new neighbourhood at night (by myself or with little E) than I ever was in Toronto
• The schools in our new neighbourhood have a great reputation for education and safety.  This is very important for both myself and my husband.  We want little E to have the opportunity to have a good education and extra curricular activities within the area she lives.
• I like that there are lots of parks and ponds were we live now.  In Toronto there were parks that I used to walk though but there were a lot of homeless people sleeping on the ground and on the benches.  I’m glad little E was too young to remember that.  The parks were nice looking (in terms of trees and flowers) but not nice for her to run around in.
• I couldn’t find many programs for moms and tots in Toronto.  When we moved to our new location there were tons of programs.  Little E and I were busy everyday doing different things.  In Toronto, if I did not take little E for walks or go to the mall we were pretty much stuck in our apartment.
• I enjoy having a backyard now.  Little E can play there while we are in the house cooking dinner and watching her from our kitchen.  In Toronto, we lived in an apartment.  It had a nice roof top but it was not child safe and I certainly would not let little E up there alone.  We did have a balcony but it was not the same as a nice quite backyard that we have now (with grass and toys for her to play with).  I am excited for little E’s first winter where we can build snowmen in the backyard.

 Q:  Can you highlight the cons of your new location in comparison to the city?
A:  My daughter goes to school here in town, and both my husband and I work in Toronto so it is far from where we work.  We spend a total of three hours commuting each day and we are away from her for roughly ten hours a day.

Q:  Do you miss anything about the city?
A:  I miss the convenience of getting to and from work and the easy access to all the amenities (shopping, theatre, restaurants, city events etc.) that Toronto has to offer.

Q:  What were your views regarding living in Toronto pre-baby?
A:  I loved living in the city.  I loved being able to meet friends after work or on the weekend and go to bars, restaurants, etc. and all within walking distance from where we lived.  I loved the fast paced environment of Toronto as well.

Q:  Would you have considered remaining in the city in a place like London had you lived in a similar building after having a child?
A:   I never really thought about it.  London has some great neighbourhoods that are very close to downtown London.  I would consider living in an area like Old North,  but not right on Talbot or Richmond Street (in the heart of London) for example.  I like the quiet.  I do not like living on busy streets anymore.  It is not only noisy but it is not safe for little E to run around.  I don’t have to worry about cars zipping through were we live now.  The only cars that come on our street are the ones that live on our street ( which is not that many).  I like looking outside my window and seeing old trees and lots of greenery as seen in suburbia.  Urban locations do not have the same richness.

Q:  Would you move back to Toronto?
A:  No.  I really liked downtown Toronto but not to raise a family.

After reviewing Erika’s responses I am no better off than when I began my investigation.  The results are inconclusive due mainly to the fact that my sample group only had one person in it.  Her answers are subjective and based on the particular location she lived in and her personal preferences in general.  Not all areas of downtown would have the same drawbacks or benefits.

Toronto has a larger footprint than London and a much bigger population.  The more people you have the more occurrences of crime, homelessness, etc..   I have concluded that London’s core is set up to cater to  students, young professionals, retirees and families, alike.  There is a child-friendly park located every few blocks.  Many of which include swimming pools and/or splash pads.  Family programs exist in a variety of locations and most of the wonderful events that take place in Victoria Park are family friendly.  Downtown London is also bordered by  some very affluent neighbourhoods which helps to provide quality educational institutions and many extra-curricular activities. 

So I am left with the feeling that I am proud to be a Londoner.  I love this city and all it has to offer.  It’s interesting that after living in London for most of my life, it is only recently that I have come to see it in this light.  Am I finally growing up and learning to appreciate the less complicated things in life?

Thank you to Erika for candidly sharing her opinions.

Music to My Ears

We all march to the beat of our own drum.  What’s good for the goose is not always good for the gander.  Chacun à son gout! 

Our likes and dislikes, among other things, is what make us unique.  The differences in our personalities and temperaments are at the heart of our relationships, and these relationships make our lives rich.  Can you picture surrounding yourself with people exactly like yourself?  Wouldn’t they just drive you crazy?  Wouldn’t that become mundane on a day-to-day basis? Sorry, but as much as I ‘like’ myself, you can have too much of a good thing.

When we first made our decision to move to a downtown condo with a young child, I witnessed and sensed many disapproving looks and attitudes.  No one actually came out and said anything explicitly negative, but it was implied.  I found myself making excuses and defending our decision to people we discussed our move with even when it wasn’t warranted.  These reactions provided my initial motivation to start City Mom.

Shortly after our move, we had some visitors to our new place and there I was, rationalizing our choice, when my visitor responded by saying “I think it’s great that you want to live downtown.  Our city needs all types of people; some to live in the suburbs and some to live in the city.”  This really made sense to me.  I had never thought of it in that way before.  What would our great city be without the individuals that live in it?  What if my Blog was so powerful and moving that everyone flocked to the city, disowning their suburban plots?  What would happen to some of the wonderful neighbourhoods that our city has like Old South, Old North and Lambeth and the small businesses and shops that conduct business there?  Or fathom the reverse; the urbanites cash in their city digs for a few more acres?  Neither scenario would be favourable to London or its inhabitants, so thank goodness for individuality and the freedom to make choices!

We have always been drawn to the city life.  Pre-baby we owned a condo in downtown Toronto right in the centre of the action.   My husband and I have always loved the sights and sounds and the hustle and bustle.  When we left T.O. for a small suburban home (to be closer to our families) we noticed how much we missed those constant sounds.  It is hard to believe that the wail of sirens, honking of horns and drone of street cars would instill a sense of calm.  It is said that silence can be deafening…for us, it was. 

Since being back in the city, I feel much more at peace.  I realized this just the other day while playing on the balcony with my daughter.  It had just finished raining and I could hear the sound of car tires on the wet asphalt and the soft hum of the large air-conditioner units from the large buildings surrounding us.  With the sun shining down on us and the symphony of sounds, when I closed my eyes, it felt very similar to sitting on the beach at the lake.  Perfectly harmonious!

I can’t speak for my daughter in regards to the sounds and how they make her feel or if she even notices them.  It is likely something to which she will become accustomed and it will be neither here nor there.  One thing I do know is that our concrete building acts as a very effective sound barrier and the most we ever hear are the dulled sounds of the nearby train and we even find that therapeutic.  Little S has never seemed to be disturbed by any of the city’s sounds.  Like the saying goes:  Sleeping like a baby!  Whether it’s a train, a plane or your neighbour’s dog, a deep sleep is a deep sleep and you’re truly blessed if you have a child who will sleep through it all!  We really weren’t sure what to expect with her and the “noise” in terms of outdoor sounds and the indoor sounds from our neighbours being so close.  After all we now have them beside us, below us and above us.  S does not seem to be affected…the neighbours on the other hand…I don’t know but can only assume that the pitter patter of tiny feet isn’t so cute at 8am on a Sunday morning.  No noise complaints yet…so keep your fingers crossed.

I really don’t think there is a better way to summarize this post then the way Petula Clark did in her song, “Downtown” and the moral of this story is that variety is the spice of life…so add some salt and pepper and enjoy!

“When you’re alone and life is making you lonely
You can always go – downtown
When you’ve got worries, all the noise and the hurry
Seems to help, I know – downtown
Just listen to the music of the traffic in the city
Linger on the sidewalk where the neon signs are pretty
How can you lose?

The lights are much brighter there
You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares
So go downtown, things’ll be great when you’re
Downtown – no finer place, for sure
Downtown – everything’s waiting for you

Don’t hang around and let your problems surround you
There are movie shows – downtown
Maybe you know some little places to go to
Where they never close – downtown
Just listen to the rhythm of a gentle bossa nova
You’ll be dancing with him too before the night is over
Happy again

The lights are much brighter there
You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares
So go downtown, where all the lights are bright
Downtown – waiting for you tonight
Downtown – you’re gonna be all right now

And you may find somebody kind to help and understand you
Someone who is just like you and needs a gentle hand to
Guide them along

So maybe I’ll see you there
We can forget all our troubles, forget all our cares
So go downtown, things’ll be great when you’re
Downtown – don’t wait a minute for
Downtown – everything’s waiting for you

Downtown, downtown, downtown, downtown.”

Crazy and the City

One of the benefits of downtown living is the ability to walk most anywhere.  Our movie store, supermarket,  coffee shop, parks, splash pads, work and school are all within a short stroll for us.  Another benefit of city living is the anonymity that comes with it.  Anonymity is something I appreciate very much.  I love being a nobody among other nobody’s.  I love the freedom that comes with not caring what others think and not knowing what they think  You’re really just another person out and about with other strangers. 

 As much as I love this new-found freedom; I have also found a few humorous downfalls…

 I try not to be a two-season complainer, however walking to work in the Summer isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.  I arrive at work with tiny beads of perspiration on my forehead and sweat dripping down my back. (London has had a really hot and humid summer so far.)  I think this could come across as attractive in some settings.  For example, if you’re out for a jog throughout the city and you run past a cute guy while sporting rosy cheeks and a cute tank-top/short-shorts ensemble.  That can be respectable and sexy on some level.  It is not appealing at 8am in the elevator at work dressed in business attire.  That’s downfall number one.

Downfall number two, perhaps the more comical one, is that I suspect that I may be viewed as that crazy downtown lady.  Our family schedule is set up so that my husband drops our daughter off at school in the morning and I pick her up in the afternoon.  I rush home from work, run upstairs (again, more sweat) change out of my work clothes, grab the stroller and head back out just in time to pick her up.  Of course my trip to gets some looks.  I walk with a vacant stroller and could appear to be one of those ‘phantom child’ women.  One who doesn’t have a child but really wishes for one…so much that they now believe they have one. 

I’ve noticed people take a second glance at my childless stroller and I’ve had a little giggle to myself, but that was just at the beginning.  Now, if it happens at all, I don’t even notice.  That is why on this day in particular I was a little surprised to find some construction guys checking me out.  It was a work from home day for me, so admittedly, I didn’t look my best.  Why wash your hair when you’re sitting in your home office all day?  I wasn’t wearing one of those cute outfits mentioned above and I didn’t feel that anything about me stood out as particularly cute, but they kept looking at me and taking second glances.  I started to feel pretty good about myself.  After all, I had just started a Booty Camp class and was already on my second week.  Maybe it wasn’t just me noticing the differences.  Maybe my boot camp training was finally speaking for me.  Naturally my stride picked up a little and maybe I added a confident little wiggle in my hips.  Yes, I am married, but what girl (married or not) does not take it as a compliment when getting checked out? 

 After picking up my daughter and making my way back home (still with the wiggle) the road crew didn’t seem as interested in my presence as they did before.  I didn’t think much of it at the time.  I had already received the attention I really didn’t think I deserved that day and was feeling pretty good.  It wasn’t until later that evening (while admiring myself in the mirror) that it dawned on me…the phantom child phenomenon.  They weren’t checking me out!  They were checking out my phantom baby.  As you  may have guessed, the next day the wiggle was gone and the hop in my step was only there because I was excited to see little S at the end of a long day!

 So, there are two morals to this story…take an extra change of clothes and some deodorant with you on a hot day and refrain from questioning why someone is checking you out…just assume it’s because you look good!